The Translator Who Didn't Know How to Spell

Some days ago I stumbled on a review on Amazon written by some Michael D. from the UK. It was about a music album by Japanese band Dir en Grey. Here is what he had to say about it - if you're in a good mood, it may give you a laugh.:

"Dir En Grey are the lastest westurn alternative fad to come out of Japan. Speaking Japanese myself and being fimiliar with the countries way of life, i know first hand who Dir En Grey are and what they are about. The album itself is devised of very modern brain dead guitar riffs with lyrics to cause shock value, with no real meaning or poise for themselves it is very hard for a speaker of Japanese, who is very much into Japanese music, such as Malice Mizer, SID, MUCC, Shiina Ringo etc, to digest this. I beleive that the album is depressive, unnececerraly and filthy, in a sadistic and brutal way. To get away with such sadistic lyrics in music, especially in music that teens may want to listen to, a band needs an excuse, or a cirtain pride in what and why they are doing it, not admittedly to shock there fans and cause disgust. they also need image to fall back on, so they can say "hey it was just a thing you know?", although Dir En Grey lack this. In many interviews i translated, Kyo has said things like "I love to shock people, and see the look on there faces", and this is just not what music is about, especially when in Japan there are many artists working hard to make music to cheer the over worked youth of Japan up. Each track is layed out like a disturbing poem, as if every track is another go at forcing the listener to take his/her earphones out and throw them to the floor. Dir En Grey have an image, they have a sound. But there image is cirtainly mockable and un origonal, as the girls of Harajuku point out quite easily and there sound requires no taste or emotion."

So Michael claims to speak Japanese, to be familiar with the country and even to be a translator of many interviews. That's fine. I just hope Michael is Japanese, or anything, but English. Because using such a boastful tone and pretentious overstatements like "i know first hand who Dir En Grey are and what they are about" and then making so many mistakes is both laughable and pathetic. The poor guy doesn't know how to write some simple words like unnecessary! How could he translate Japanese into a language he can't spell right? Please, tell me Michael doesn't translate into English.

Let's help Michael with his English homework by correcting his mistakes.

"Dir En Grey is the latest western alternative fad to come out of Japan. Speaking Japanese myself and being familiar with the country way of life, i know first-hand who Dir En Grey is and what they are about. The album itself is devised of very modern brain-dead guitar riffs with lyrics to cause shock value, with no real meaning or poise for themselves; it is very hard for a speaker of Japanese, who is very much into Japanese music, such as Malice Mizer, SID, MUCC, Shiina Ringo etc, to digest this. I believe that the album is depressive, unnecessary and filthy, in a sadistic and brutal way. To get away with such sadistic lyrics in music, especially in music that teens may want to listen to, a band needs an excuse, or a certain pride in what and why they are doing it, not admittedly to shock their fans and cause disgust. they also need image to fall back on, so they can say "hey it was just a thing you know?", although Dir En Grey lacks this. In many interviews i translated, Kyo has said things like "I love to shock people, and see the look on their face", and this is just not what music is about, especially when in Japan there are many artists working hard to make music to cheer the overworked youth of Japan up. Each track is laid out like a disturbing poem, as if every track is another go at forcing the listener to take his/her earphones out and throw them to the floor. Dir En Grey has an image, they have a sound. But their image is certainly mockable and unoriginal, as the girls of Harajuku point out quite easily, and their sound requires no taste or emotion."

If there's something mockable, it's your spelling, old boy. Also, I think his opinion is stupid, but that's another story.